Who We Met At the Linn County Courthouse in Albany Oregon

 This week we went to Albany, Oregon, the county seat of Linn County, Oregon. It was the most productive place we visited so far, although we met a couple of people there when we stood by the courthouse last year.

#1. The first person we met was a man driving a taxi who parked behind us. He told us that he fought over custody of his children with his wife and that it was a challenging experience. He was, however, compassionate towards his wife. She had been sexually abused by someone in ministry for her Jehovah's Witness Church and had sued the church. He recognized the connection between her childhood trauma and their child custody battle and agreed that mental health was a valuable part of the whole equation.

#2.  Next, a veteran walked by us on the courthouse steps. He told us he struggled with PTSD and had been hospitalized with depression and other problems. He felt that mental health support was really important. Please note that we are not advocating for requiring the government to offer everyone free therapy, although I think that would be great.  I want the government to offer classes in mental health skills to parents before marriage and childbirth, and after childbirth, as well as before and after divorce, as problems arise. A therapist can offer support beyond classes and is still really valuable. I think teaching mental health skills can improve well-being for most parents and children relatively cheaply. Given that many people want to limit taxes and spending for very good reasons, I am thinking about a solution that can offer maximal benefits for less money. My solution still requires people to take responsibility for learning mental health and communication skills and using them.

#3. Then a father walked up the steps of the courthouse and paused briefly to talk to us. He was there to obtain a court order to see his kids, whom he had not seen in five weeks. I know how painful that is, having been through that myself. I was able to regain contact with the daughter I lost by working with therapists and doing what they told me to do. They testified for me in court. But this process played out over a year and a half and cost me $45,000. How many parents can afford that cost, and what does a lost contact between parent and child cost both of them on an emotional level? We need a faster, cheaper solution to the problem than relying on the very slow and expensive legal process.

#4 Then a court employee came by. She took one of my books and bookmarks with my various social media accounts listed on them to place in the court's resource room for parents.

#5. Then an official court mentor walked by us on his way up the steps of the courthouse. He was trying to help a young woman struggling with both drug addiction and child custody issues. We gave him my mental health workbook and a bookmark with my Facebook --The Family Mental Health and Child Custody Act https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573282306216, Blogger blog -- https://compassionategathering.blogspot.com/ and YouTube channel https://www.youtube.com/@StopAbuseHealWounds.

Please note: working with a professional therapist and professionally trained instructors who can help you study and learn Nonviolent Communication and Dialectical Behavior Therapy is always the best thing you can do for yourself. If you can't afford this, my social media accounts offer a modest amount of free help to cope with a child custody battle and related mental health issues caused by child abuse or domestic violence 

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